Grand Marnier Cake

While living in Istanbul and watching BBC television, I learned about true cooking.  I don't know if I had ever talked about my mother's cooking.  To quickly recap: it was horrible and I believe that she enjoyed torturing us.  This would include her sibling and their children as well. Which is the reason why as of today, moving forward in my life, I decided to learn how to cook the right way.  For all our survive.

Now I know that some of us are not baking masters however we would contribute something to the Thanksgiving or the Christmas dinner dessert table. So here is another simple recipe for you.

Preheat the over @ 325 degrees.

In a nice size mixing bowl:

1 box of Duncan Hines Spice Cake Mix 

3 eggs (as stated on the back of the cake box)

1 cup of water (as stated on the back of the cake box)

1/4 cup of olive oil (do not use cooking oil as the back of the cake box says)

1/4 cup of Grand Marnier

1 orange which you will shave the outside skin to into the cake mix, then that orange cut in half and squeeze it like you are making fresh orange juice. You want the pulp from that and about a 1/3 of the juice from that one orange to go into the mix. 

Mix well.  

I am suggesting that you use a bundt cake pan for this cake.  Butter and flour well in the event that you do not have a can of Pam baking spray.

For those of you who like walnuts, you can add 1/4 cup of walnuts please make sure that you crush real well before adding to the mixture.

The cake should take about 20 to 25 minutes to bake.  If you check it the first time that top of the cake looks somewhat wet, give it a slight shake and if the top of the cake move keeps it in the oven for another 7 or 8 minutes.   To see if the cake is completely done: use the knife check.  That's taking the knife poking it through the cake and taking it out to make sure that the cake is done all the way through.  If the knife comes out clean then the cake is done.  Let it cake cool off in the pan for about 20 minutes before putting it on a plate.  

For the icing combine 1/4 cup of powder sugar and 1 teaspoon of nutmeg.  Stir well and then shift it lightly over the cake.

And there you have it everyone.  A simple cake that even the non-baker can make.

Enjoy!!

A Hedgehog's Dilemma

Now some of y'all already know that I favorite hobby is to watch Korean soap operas on Dramafever. Y'all there have been times where I have called either Asia or Glenna crying after watching one of them. They be laughing at me and I tell them watching the  Korean soaps  while going thru perimenopause is a very strong roller coaster that sometimes I can not control. Though getting through my emotions all in one sitting can be and has been very healthy for me for the past year.

At this time I was doing a marathon and I was watching a show by the name of Murphy's Law of Love, and right way I knew that I was watching my life story in Taiwanese and how absolutely interesting and funny it. (My very own shade!  Love It!)

So I get to episode 17 where the heroine meets up with her ex-boyfriend and he tells her about what he needed to do take control of his life after their breakup. First, you got to watch the show to understand where it was coming from and second, I wish I was with her sharing that bottle of Kurt Champagne after her had just been dumped (the 1st episode).  Cause we could have ordered a 2nd and 3rd bottle on his ass. She and I would have drank that second bottle of Kurt and used the first to crack his damn head in!

Back to episode 17, she started to talk about the"Hedgehog's Dilemma."  Yeap, y'all heard what the hell I just said, the Hedgehog's Dilemma. It is a metaphor using hedgehogs to describe how we human try to take control over a situation or relationship (yea, situation because some of y'all do not like to use the word "relationship" with the specific other!) when trying to stay close to one another to keep warm during the winter. (It is amazing how we, some of us, would have a freak for the summer and get rid of them when September comes and then, by November we are scouting for a new body to stay warm with. What was wrong with Summer? Wasn't she okay?)

Back to hedgehogs, see hedgehogs can not get too close to each other with hurting one and another with their spines. (See I didn't know this because had I did when I needed to my ass scratch, I don't think I would have not mind a prick or two back there.) (Yeah I am a freak but let's not tell everybody!)

The hedgehogs would have to suffer many wounds before they can finally find the distance that is comfortable for the two of them to keep each other warm without hurting one another any further.  It is called a space heater, y'all!  Buy one!!!

Look, come those cold nights, for those of us who are single, we yearn to be with someone whom we first really like, second really want to be with, and third really enjoy being with that person,   But may I make a suggestion? Buy a body pillow from Walmart! Save yourself a lot of stress if you don't like any one for now (speaking in long period) or for the time being (meaning like yesterday).

I think for some of us, it is really hard to get next to some one that we are interested in for whatever reason, and at the same time it is difficult for some of us to let some one in who is interested in us to come into their comfort zone. And for many of us sleeping with any one just for the fun of it is not something that most would do.  Yes most of us would do and you know who you are.  Or maybe it is because you do want a warm body to be close with, you are just choosing to wait to be with some one of the same mind as you.  I am not judging and I am encouraging it!

For me right now it is too damn hot to be talking getting cozy with someone.   I am dying for a pitcher of lemonade, for real y'all! Besides I think Texas doesn't understand what winter is since it is since in the 80s and 90s. And since I don't have fall for the time being, I am glad that we have pillows!! We should really make use of them. Or at least buy an electric blanket for the winter!  I am going to Toys R Us and find me a big ass stuff dog to be my pillow.  Or a pony. (Only some of y'all would get it!)

November All Ready!!!

Happy All Saint's Day Everyone!!! (November 1st!!)

To those of you who do not celebrate the whole Halloween thing and those of you who did too much trick-n-treating last night.  Isn't it nice that we can be a devil or a witch on one day and the following we can go to Saint Peter and ask him to forgive us provide that he gets the Heavenly Father permission first of course?

But okay, okay reality is now starting to stink in for some of us who start planning for the Thanksgiving dinner and Christmas dinner, Christmas vacation, etc.  I am already planning my holiday liquor in Milwaukee with Asia and Sam.  I would start practicing now but I need to focus on school. (Haha haha I think this is why I started drinking in the first place! I started school back in 2008 and haven't stopped drinking since then!)

(Leave me to my denial please!)

Okay, so I got a few dates to bring to the surface for November before Thanksgiving Day.

So November 1st is also National Calzone Day, no Ilantian should be safe on this day.

November 2nd is Traffic Director Day - there is such a job?!

November 3rd - National Men Make Dinner Day!  No BBQ is allowed, so get your ass in the kitchen and make sure you clean up your mess!

November 5th - National Donut Day. A day where police offer everywhere does not have to feel guilty about having a donut or 2 or 4  or 7.

November 6th - Daylight Saving Time. I am already losing sleep!!

November 8th - Nation Harvey Wallbanger Day.  This is a drink, right? Because I am all for having another drinking holiday.

November 11th - National Sundae Day.  This is not good for those of us who are latoast intolerant with dairy!

November 12th - National Pizza with the Works Except for Anchovies Day! Y'all is by y'all selves on with this one!

November 19th - National Monopoly Day. Isn't Time Warren already doing that to us monthly?

November 24th - Thanksgiving Day!! So this is the official day where those of us who have to diet for some time start to put that weight back on. We continue with the weight gaining until Christmas more or less. There would be leftover from Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner if your cousins or Uncle Joe has not eaten you out of house and home.

After Thanksgiving, it is time to pull all the decorations out to doll up the house for Christmas. It also means it is time to spend that secret savings account that you open earlier this year to do your Christmas shopping. Which bring us to. . . . . . .

November 25th - Black Friday and November 28th - Cyber Monday.  Shopping spree for everyone!! Mama needs a brand new flat screen television. This is the start for most us when we become broke.

November 30th - Stay Home Because You're Well Day.  Yeah, it is called playing hooky, damn it!!

Oh yeah, let me not forget the most important date for this month - November 8th, which is Election Day!  Despite all the negativity in the media these days, I am looking at both candidates' background for experiences.

Can I vote for Jose Cuervo instead?

The Difference in Quitting and Giving Up!

Recently I was given a letter where the word "quit" was used against me.  Upon reading the letter even though the Company A understood my reasons for the request that I asked for, Company B use the word "quit" to describe me.

First of all, ladies and gentlemen, I am NOT a quitter.  If a few of you are like me then you grow with a family or with grandparents who enstealed in you reasons as to why you should never quit something that will have a bright light at the end of tunnel. You were probably told that quitters never to get to accomplish anything else in life, and that they find some things in life too difficult to handle as the older they gets.

My grandfather was very strong able us grandchildren completing things or goals so that we come reep the rewards to have a better life.  And in turn we parents try to teach our children not to become quitters themselves.

However when it comes to that damn job, most of us quit on the principle, principles that you believe in when it came to the company that you worked for.  But some of us quit because we don't like the rules and regulations or that damn supervisor/manger.  And to prevent from putting your foot in his\hers ass you just simple left that job.  right?

Giving up is a different matter all together! To give up is to acknowledge that you can not find a solution to the problem at hand or when you cannot get some one, and usually is it the spouse, to find reason with you. Okay, okay let me make it fair, it could also a co-worker, board members  But we also give up on that problem that you should have step your foot in his\her ass. You give up on fixing that sewer pipe system and call the professionals who will do a faster and cleaner job: you pay more but that is okay.

You give up on wrecking your brain on silly, stupid shit like worrying about his no good ass. Keep it moving: a good worthy person will come to you.  You can give up on a relationship that is going no where.  In fact I recommend that you do for your own peace of mind. You give up on trying to solve that algebra problem: some of us are NOT Albert Einstein unless you love a challenge.

What most of us don't seem to understand is that when you quit it is a complete done action.  When you give up, you can go back and try again.   Either way, we as family members, friends and strangers can encourage each other to continue on the path of our dreams or help each other understand that completing that goal is a self-satisfying accomplishment.

So I personally would like to encourage everyone who has dreams that they have not started on and having a rough time getting them started or have started them and having a rough time in the process of do it\them or goals that are taking long to complete than they should, to not quit or give up.  And then again, whatever it is, if it is positive, don't give up and don't quit.

I am eight classes from graduating with my Masters, for me it is out of the question to do either quit or give up.

Good luck everyone!!

A Scary October for Sure!!!

Okay, let me say that it is scary that we only have two months left of 2016 when once we get through October.  That is frighten to comprehend,

Where did the year go and for the time being I can only remember the year being a year of shootings and riots.  Of course, there is the President election with the entertaining Donald Trump! (Yeah, I said it! Not voting for his ass!)

So believe it or not our day into October is a scary holiday for real! October 1st is National Ghost Hunting Day! I can not remember what channel it is on cable but they have all these Ghost Chasers Shows that I was absolutely annoyed by whenever Pat would watched them.  (Sidebar: No longer living with Pat! Now I can get some damn sleep!!) Now I am not interested in chasing any damn ghost let alone visiting any damn hunted house! I might visit Great America for their Halloween Special, I said I might!!  Strong ass might here!

I, personally can not wait until October 4th which is National Taco Day and National Vodka Day! The Lord must have heard my prayers for this one.  This day is a given!! When I go to the Mexican restaurant and order tacos, I want a good Jose Cuevero Gold Margrita with extra Gold, of course. However that margrita can not go with most of the tacos that are out there.  If you are having a seafood taco or a Pork al Pastor then you have Vodka on the run or a mix drink with Vodka mixed in to get the better taste of the tacos.  In fact if you are having any kind of pork taco I recommend that you have a Vodka kind of drink to go with.

October 6th is National Mad Hatter Day.  I think on this day I will rent Alice and the Wonderland Part 1 & 2 to pay tribute to the character, not Johnny Deep. (Sidebar: I am so happy to hear that all the drama with him has died down.)  This is also Nation Noodle Day! I would need a bottle of Sujo to go with my ramen noodle, a bottle (or two) of Sake to go with my Pho and a bottle of Plum wine to go with my Udno noodles.

October 10th is National Kick Butt Day! This could be bad on so many levels because for all those people who told some one that they were going to kick their kick butt, like that manager or supervisor who fired you, your day is truly coming. Because it now a national holiday!! (Siderbar: If the managers and/or supervisors were smart in their position, they should take this day off from work! And hide.)

October 12th is National Freethought Day! I think that not just for myself, but also for a few others, we need this day everyday for those Blonde moments.

October 13th is National No Bra Day! I am frighten when I see my own shit hanging, I sure in the hell don't want to see somebody else's shit hanging!!!!  With some women that can be truly frightening.

October 15th is National Grouch Day.  This does not need to be a holiday because it is America's 3rd favorite past time!

October 16th is National Dictionary Day.  Isn't dictionary now consider a cuss word? We have Google!

October 17th is National Clean Your Virtual Desktop Day.  This is also wrong on so many level because 60% of the people do not know what a virtual desktop is while you still have 80% of the people who still have not learned to clean off the kitchen table. The remaining 20% belongs to the mothers who not lone clean off that kitchen but also what virtual desktop is. And NO!! She does not know how to clean that up!

October 21st is National Reptile Awareness Day. YEAP!! I will have me a new bag, some new pair shoes and a belt. YEAP, that will be my awareness!!

October 27th is National American Beer Day, now is a holiday that 7 out of 10 would consider a this a everyday holiday.

Than we have October 31 which is National Caramel Apple Day, National Knock-knock Jokes Day, National Magic Day, Girl Scout Founder's Day and Halloween.  How does not love caramel apples? When I see them in season I usually buy 2 or 3 3-package at a one time.  As for Knock-knock jokes if you got a good one let me know. Those jokes are scary from the start of  Knock-knock joke.

Now Girls Scouts can be scary all by themselves, they do not need Halloween. When they start selling those cookies, buy some asap!

I can not wait for Halloween to get here to see how Dallas will celebrate. Let's see if I can end the month on a scary note.

A Moving Experience!

Y'all I know that I have been slacking for two months, however, I have a very good reason. . . . I moved!

Yeap! I took another leap into another adventure in my life.

This move has been in the works since the beginning to the year.  Though I had one major factor in my mind at that time, however, it is funny when life throw some many things at you that will cause you think again as to what is currently going in your life.

You know how in your last few weeks or n recent weeks, reality always gives you something that will leave you in a state of mind that will cause you to either conscience or non-conscience make a change in your current place that slowly starts to hit you.  Regardless if it is a decision of changing jobs or moving across the city, across the state or across the nation. And the next thing you know is that you have to make a move or this move for best for you.

Then came crunch time!  See during the summer I was packaging all my things in tubs, the big 44 gallon tubs.  I got rid some book and packed away my fall and winter clothing and boots.  Repacked all the kitchen dishes and got rid of summer clothes to replace them with new summer dresses.  But when it came to the shoes, I do not think some of y'all understand how hard it was trying to narrow it down to which shoes were going with me: which high heels scandals should go in the suitcase, which should be shipped to Dallas or scandals go into the tubs for storage.

Yes people it was a huge dilemma for me!

During that dilemma, I had to decide whether or not to use private movers or get a POD: the POD was cheaper and more convenient.  But with getting the POD I have to get a permit to place the POD on the main street since we did not have a driveway in the front or the back of the house.  I had to make countless phone calls to City Hall, who then, in turn, call me back numerous of time to inform me that the street I live is a major Avenue and it cost me $200 for a 2-day permit. Yeap!

But wait! It is getting more stressful.

I had decided to ship the majority of my summer clothes to Dallas and I had scheduled for my summer clothes to be shipped by FEDEX.  I had seven packages ready to be picked up on September 6th and when the day came, I waited all day until 8 p.m. and they did not show up.  Okay, livid stage 1!

So I called FEDEX, spoke to a representative who let me know that there was no scheduled time for the pickup.  WHAT?! When I did schedule them online your company's website did not get time or else I would not be talking to a representative about this. And according to the representative they can come pick them up tomorrow after 12 noon.  No the hell you can not unless FEDEX wishes to buy me another AMTRAK ticket to Dallas. In a sleeper, of course!?  Okay, livid stage 2!

So long story short, the next day I had to rent a car to drop the seven packages off at a FEDEX Shipping Center at 8 in the morning. What fun did I have! Explaining the situation to employees at the Shipping Center, they gladly helped with the package and made sure that they were sent.

Until they called me while I am en route to Chicago to tell me that my packages had to be repackaged so that they do not damage while being shipped. Okay and thank you, and it turned out that they put the 4 small tubs in 3 huge big boxes however the very large tote had to be open and everything in there was put in a huge large box.  Okay.

My over-night trip in an AMTRAK sleeperette was comfortable complete with meals. It even came with an attendant who turned down our bed and got us anything else that we may need.  And let not forget to tell y'all that the sleeper car came with showers. You can find that in coach!

Upon arriving in Dallas, of the 4 suitcases that I traveled with, the largest of the four was severely damaged enough that I had to file a damage claim with AMTRAK.

Upon arriving at the cousin's house, I had to quickly schedule Time Warren to get cable, internet, and phone bundle in the house ASAP!

Upon getting settled in my cousin's house, need to clean the house and there is no food!! Let me get dolled up and go to Walmart for all the things that I need to take care and run this house. Lord!!

Upon that Saturday arriving and FEDEX delivering my packages, all was good and that include my "baby" HP desktop.  But my flat screen television, y,all I was simply flabbergast beyond belief. When I called FEDEX I could not even cuss them out because I was just too astonished from the outcome of the delivery. Yes, I filed a claim because I did have insurance on television.  But here is the irony of the delivery: so the lady is claims said that they will ship the television back to its original point of location, and I said: "Young lady, I shipped it to Dallas."  Which she still give me a confirmation for them the pick up the television and then for me to tell the person who came to picked the television up that I shipped it to myself.  How are you going to ship it back to me when I moved from Milwaukee to Dallas to myself? (Yes, laugh at the stupidity of this one!)

But wait, the final climax from FEDEX came that Monday afternoon, people.  I go to check my bank account to see what pennies were still there and to my growing surprise with FEDEX, I see an amount taken that I sure in the hell did not agree.  And what department in FEDEX did you think that I called? (Take a guess?)

BILLINGS!!!! And you bet your sweet ass, that only did I relay the entire FEDEX events including filing the claims on my television, but I also asked them to at least be reasonable regarding the bill for the entire matter.

Remember people, I am way too astonished to cuss! In fact, y'all I had to let the accountant in Billings know I was still to astonished to be mad. And I wondering how is it the FEDEX can packages for business with such care but for residents be so sloppy in handling their personal packages?

Ladies and gentlemen, I got two claims, a Time Warren bundle, and a refund all from moving to Dallas. Other than the freaking heat down here, I can not wait to see what else Dallas has for me!

And this boy here needs new pots and pans, and silverware . . . . all hell I just need to make a list!!

I am Just Saying!

Ok let me tell the story first to explain why it prompted me to even start thinking and writing about the famous phrase "I am just saying!"

This was a usual Saturday at the Jew Home at 8:30 am when one of the care taker came to the lobby with a care taker who will filling in for her for the next 24 hours.  In the conversation with the four of us ladies (there was me, the security guard on duty Sam, Brenda the regular care taker and her replacement who name we did not catch), as Sam and I were trying to get to know the replacement she came off a little hostile about being here.  So as asked if she will be here with the resident she replied "Yeap!" and the way she said it, it had a hint of "I don't want to be here!" And the first that came to my mind in which I said "Geçmiş olsun!" Though I did explain what it meant, her following response causing me and Sam to look at her with blank expressions. Yes people, it was a "I am just saying!" moment.

Y'all, there are times that when some people would say these "I am just saying!" with their initial comment, that we just want to either slap the shit out of that person or we will be make a comment back to them to pissed the hell off even farther.  Or we would even reply back with the phrase "You could have keep that comment to yourself!" in which you and them get pissed off and it is you wanting to slap the shit out of the person! And y'all know that feeling because you give that person the side eye and it give a though of "What the hell or what the fuck!"

So here is my thinking: most of us used the phrase "I am just saying!" with some of our comments to farther explain what we are already commenting or responding to.  I think that some of the most annoying "I am just saying!" comments come when there really should not be anything said when words should not be said, or to further insult someone just for the hell of it.

When it used in a business sense it is often done to prompt one to really consider the pros and cons or in reference. When it used between 2 or more good friends (I said good friends) it is done to help point out some things with the topic at hand unless you are watching one of the Real Housewives soap opera saga, then it is done out of pure freaking spite-full-ness!

But the most common used "I am just saying!" moments are when we (yes, all of you including me) want to give our personal opinion about something that we either know nothing about or we feel that we have to say say something.

"I am just saying!"

July - the Birthday Month!

Alright, we are in the second half of the year and I am already ready for winter. However I will not be spending it here Milwaukee.  But for the time being, I am going to have lots of fun in this month!

July 1st - National Postal Worker Day.  This is a day I think all postal workers should take revenge on those who have dogs and allow their dogs to run after them.  This is always a day I think that all postal workers national should have the day off.

July 3rd - National Eat Your Bean Day.  This would cause the world to deploy for sure! And we do not have enough air fresher to save us on this day and the day after.

July 4th is Independence Day but it also National Hillbilly Day.  Can we say "DAMN!"?

July 10th - National Pina Colada Day.  I hope this will come with 2 sots of rum.

July 11th - National Mojito Day. This is another excuse for drinking something good!  But then again who needs an excuse to have a drink?

July 12th - National Paper Bag Day.  Now most of women already carry too many bags making us the official bag ladies, but soon as more and more men are beginning to carry a more bags themselves to and from work, we are going to have to find a name for them fast.

July 14th - National Grand Marnier Day and National Nude Day.  For the nude part, some of us has already made everyday a National Nude Day.  Grand Marnier - Je suis si heureux que les Français ne gardait pas belle boisson un secret pour eux-mêmes. (I am so glad that the French did not keep beautiful drink a secret for themselves.)

July 15th - National Give Something Away Day.  Do you know how hard it is for a woman to give away a purse, some clothing, and a pair of shoes?

July 18th - National Get Out of the Dog House Day.  Okay, if men are smart, for those of you who are in trouble with your wife you should use this day as a negotiation piece to get back in your wife good grace.  For the wives, you should use this day as a day to get your husband to do just about any and everything to prove that he wants out of the dog house.

July 20th - National Moon Day.  Though Astronomers would look at the moon that is up in the sky/galaxy, there are those who would take this day as a day to shine others. (Sidebar: Let me get shined on this day, I got a rock for their asses!)

July 21st - National No Makeup Day. Ain't no way in hell I am stepin' outside with no makeup! Can I at least put on some BB Cream and fix my eye brow, so I can look half way human in the mornings?

July 24th - National Tequila Day.  I am beginning to understand that the month of July is dedicated to those who love to drink.  Like me (with a smile on my face!)

July 27th - National Scotch Day.  See what I mean! And please no scotch or whisky for me because y'all won't be having me dancing and stripping in the middle of the street again.

For those of you who are on summer vacation, you better make the most of it, because the time to go back to school with be here sooner than you think. And my diet is officially over because it is also bar-b-que season! Can I get an Amen?

Tequila Almond Cake!

While I living in Istanbul, I learned how to cook and bake a lot of different food.  Now some of those food I still make today if I have both time and the ingredients to do so.

Okay, so the past year my friend Asia has been asking me to make my Tequila Almond cake for her. The main reason that I have not, until recently, made this cake for her is because she has to have gluten free food.  So secretly I was trying to make it using gluten free flour however it did not taste right.  My advice - stick with the original recipes for certain dishes.

When I was living over there, I had to make the cake from scratch, however since I been home, I have learned how to make this cake the short quick way.

What you need:

• mixing bowl (medium size) and a whisk
• Pillsbury White Cake mix
• 3 eggs
• 1/4 cup of Olive oil
• 1/4 cup of crushed Almonds
• Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila, 2 separate - 1/4 cups for the cake mix 
• 1 teaspoon of Almond extract

For the icing:

• mixing bowl (small one) and a whisk
• Pillsbury Cream Cheese Icing
• Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila

Pre-heat the oven at 375 degrees.

So now you can start with a simple white cake recipe, I am recommending that you go get a box of Pillsbury White Cake mix because it allows the flavors to be tasted in this cake.  Plus alternations that will be done to the cake mix will still allow the cake to full flavor.  Following the recipes on the back of the cake box with the exceptions of using cooking oil you are going to use Olive Oil instead.  Mix the cake mix.

As you are mixing, you are going to mix in one teaspoon of Almond extract and 1/4 cup of crushed almond (almost ground form) into the mix.  Mix well.

Now I am going to recommend that you get you a bottle of Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila.  This particular tequila mix and taste well with almond extract.  Add two 1/4 cup of the tequila slowly because it needs to mix well.

Before pouring the mix in a cake, spray with Pam baking spray.  Pour the mix in any cake you want, however I will use a 13" x 9" so that icing flow even under neath the cake in the pan.  Bake for 15 -20 minutes or the fork comes out clean from checking.

*Note: that the cake will shriek a little because of the alcohol.  Do not be alarm!

Let the cake cool off for more than a hour. Mean while mix the icing.  In the mixing bowl, start off with half of the cream cheese icing and 1 shot glass of tequila. Mix well until their is no liquid around the edge of the cream.  Add the remaining of the cheese and the second shot glass of tequila.  Mix well.  As you are mixing you will notice that the cream cheese is getting cream and creamer. You can add more tequila at your discretion.

Pour the icing over the cake.  You might have to spread it evenly over the cake a little bit.  Let it flow over the edge of the cake.  Sprinkle some crunch almond on the top of the icing.  Wait a little bit before serving to let the addition tequila soak in the cake from the sides and underneath.

If there is a strong tequila smell from the cake, then you did the recipe right.

If you get asked how much tequila you put in the cake, you always answer "There is 2 shots in the cake and more than 2 shots in the icing!"

Enjoy!

June darling, where have you been?

Hello June. (doesn't it sound like that you are literally talking to a lady with that word as a name?)

Okay, who is ready to sit outside, bar-b-que, and splask mosquitoes for the summer?  ME!!!!

Who is ready to sit in the nail salon for an hour or two to get their pedicure done for the summer? ME!!! Have you ever notice that during the summer is when all the nail salons shops are packed with either an extend time or a sorry we booked time?

Who is ready to try all to fresh and new summer salads?  When you get a plate, be sure to have one come this was as well.

Who is ready to smell that beautiful sweet aroma of a bar-b-que pit followed by that make your noise chase that smell grilled bar-b-que ribs?  And you know the smell because huh from the gut, follow by a head shaking, shoulder scrunch, your mouth can already tasted it smell!!!  MEEE!!!!

Who is ready to go to some of the those summer festivals and drink lots of beer?  ME!!!!!

Now I got some dates for June that I have to acknowledge so I would know how to plan my events for the month.

June 1st - National Say Something Nice Day -  That is going to be really difficult for some people! And you know who they are!

June 2nd - National Leave Work Early Day - If you part time, this does not work for you. If you work 2nd, maybe depending on your job. However if you work third shift, don't think about it.  Just call off for the night.

June 3rd - National Donut Day - Of course all the police officers will be happy about this day, but secretly so would the FBI and the Secret Service.

June 4th - National Cognac Day - which is really good on a banana cheesecake with some hazelnut.

June 8th - National Best Friend Day - If I can be in Tempe, AZ for us ladies to go out for lunch and do some over due girl shopping. And since she can not have alohol, I will gladly drink all her martinis for her. As for my girls up her, well we toasted to our friendship at every chance we get!

June 14th - National Bourbon Day -  I would like  to be in the time period of 1880s - 1890s because that is when Bourbon was consider the main drink to have.  A romantic period.

June 17th - National Flip Flop Day -  Since Old Navy have flip flops for like $4.00, I need to shop to prepare for this day.

June 19th - National Martini Day -  A good reason to call off work! However everyday should be a martini day.

June 23rd - National Pink Day - I am girl however y'all (all females and some guys too) can have this day.

June 30th - Social Media Day - Apparently who ever thought to realize to give Social Media a day, should have stop at 2 martinis.

So as we entered the month of June, let's us remind ourselves that we half way done with 2016.

And who is ready to go the beach to get a suntan?  HELL NO!!!  Now I will be wearing my fabulous summer dress, fashionable sandals, and a cute sunglasses to and from the job, the restaurants and the clubs. But that is as far as it is going child!!

Y'all enjoy this month.  With a martini!!

The Istanbul Chronicles: Mary Poppins

So it was my first winter in Istanbul and it was the first winter that Glenna and I was spending together.  Of course I can tell you that the winters in Turkey are far different from the winter in Chicago.  The differences are that one, Istanbul is some 2,634 meters above sea level (y'all don't ask me how many miles is that! I am still on the meters part) and two, there is no wind but the steel cold  that is sharp enough to cut through all the layers that is between your coat and clothes.

Now as a Chicagoan I am so used to being blow around by strong wind that I sometimes don't even move. But on this particular day in which I am about to talk about, I had to be Glenna's anchor so that she would not get blown way.  I did tell y'all that there is no wind in the winter, right?

  Before I mentioned that we lived in Kadikoy inside Istanbul and on this day I can not remember where Glenna and I was going however we were heading towards the ferries by the Bosporus.  We had just cross the Albay Faik Sozdener Caddesi (a mouth full, I know. I lived there and still could not pronounce that damn street name right) walking towards Rihtim Caddesi talking about who else; Edward's ass.

Here is a short story about me and Glenna first winter together.

It was the winter of 2001 and Glenna and I stuck up like two sore thumbs in our winter coating.  Glenna like a dark marshmallow man in her black snowsuit and me look like a black Russian socialite in my long red cashmere coat with fur cups on both arms and a fur hat. And let me not forget the long black umbrella, but even in the mist of the fresh new snow that was coming down, you could still spot us as we walked arm in arm towards the ferries.

As we walking there were three young men behind us and we can hear them talking.  Glenna could not make out what they were saying and all I can tell her was that they are talking about nothing, so Glenna proceed to continue to talk about Edward and how he was about money. Suddenly I notice that their conversation had change and that they were now talking about the woman in the red coat. One friend ask another to ask her if she was for sale.  This worries me because I see no other woman within five feet or more near us in a red coat except me and I am trying really hard not to pay attention to these kids.  And it was really hard to do so.

Glenna still talking about that damn Edward as we are walking across the park to the ferries.  But then the young boys started to really question as to who should be the first to have business with me; y'all I was like "What the Fuck!" and in a moment of quickness without warning to Glenna did a turn about so fast that Glenna was confused with the "What the Fuck!" in the middle of her sentence.

To their own surprise, all three of them went their separate ways and I ran after on the one who did the most talking, with my umbrella waving in the air.  If only Dick Van Dyke was there to see what new defense tactic that was then in used.  Supercalilfragilisticexpialidocious (Fuck that is a word!) was not in my head at that time.  (Hats off to the person(s) who create that word!)

In her own state of confusion, Glenna said all she saw was a red coat woman running looking like Mary Poppin with her umbrella open flying in the Istanbul's winter air.  Okay, so I give the hood verse in Muslim country.  They went along with it.

Y'all, all I remember that I was madder than hell and wanted to put just a little fear in their heads about the woman in the red coat.

'Til this day, Glenna still does not understand what the hell happen that day!  All she remembers is Mary Poppins running across the park. The same goes here with me, I don't understand why I felt what I felt that day.  Never the less, my feelings for Turkey will never change, and I will always love it there for it's rich culture and it's kick-ass scenery.

May baby!!!!

May is here people and we know what that means, right?  Mother’s Day is coming!!!  Who like me has a list of mothers that they too wish to find a great gift for?

May 1^st Law Day since I have ever broken the law, can I used this day to do so?

May 2nd National Life Insurance Day which goes well with National Truffle Day because that is a good reason to die by chocolate. And if that day for chocolate does not work well for you, then consider,  

May 3^rd National Chocolate Custard Day! (I am just saying!)  For all teckies out there May 3^rd is also National SAN Architect Day, which reminds me to update my MS Visio to create one.  Plus it is National Two Different Colored Shoes Day.  This is so fashionable incorrected!

May 4^th will have a more specific meaning to it so it will be National Star Wars Day, hence “May the force be with you!”  This day is shared with National Orange Juice Day, which I don’t mind as long as it also involves Vodka.

May 5^th Cinco de Mayo, I am ready trying to create a good ass excuse to NOT go to work that day.

May 8^th is Mother’s Day.  Please tell me that you all have found or in the process of getting a good gift for your mother or made arrangement for flowers to be flowers to be deliver or made reservation at a special restaurant.  Okay, these are ideals so get your own for Mother’s Day.

May 9^th is National Lost Sock Memorial Day.  I guess on this day all those single socks that you have in draw waiting to find the long lost single probably dirty again sock, put them in a shoe box and go bury the box in a good fashion.

May 11^th is National Third Shift Workers Day.  Do we even celebrate First and Second shift or did we move them to get to Third?

May 13^th is National Apple Pie Day, so go ahead and eat that pie. On this day it is also National Blame Someone Else Day that way you can blame it on “I don’t know!” for it the missing piece of the pie since he is the one person that you cannot claim on their income taxes.

May 15^th is National Nylon Stoking Day, though I and about 95% of women have stop wearing them, however we still know to use them to rope you suckers (men!) into doing whatever we you do.

May 16^th is National Piercing Day.  I can run in so many different ways with this one and only because some piercing are exotic and extremely sexual. (I am just saying!)

May 18^th is National No Dirty Dishes Day: this will never exist in my current home.  However when I move into my new place in September I will enjoying the shit out of this day!

May 20^th is National Be a Millionaire Day.  For me this will only happen in Turkey.  Because the joke is that everyone is a Millionaire. $1 dollar = 1 million lira! So my 10 million Turkish lira will buy me lunch with a beer.  It is also National Pia Party Day, which is even better because I can get 3 Turkish pizza with my 10 million Turkish lira.

May 22^nd is National Vanilla Pudding Day

May 24^th is National Escargot Day

May 25^th is National Wine Day, though I do have a glass or 4 per week.

May 28^th is National Brisket Day and National Hamburger Day. Now with this day and the four that I just mention before, as I was writing this I felt 25 pounds being add to my hips and ass.

May 31^st is National Speak in Sentences Day.  “What?” There it is ladies and gentlemen, my noun, my subject and my verb?

Well everyone, I see that i have a busy month and I am sure most of you will be busy with graduation, prom, 8th grade trips, and Mother's Day.  

I got a new semester to fight with.  Until next time..

April is here!

Hello everyone! I see that we have enter into April.  Where are the damn showers at?  My April thus far has been fill with and still is a frozen with snow. . . STILL!  Sometimes it is a mixture of  snow/rain or rain/snow.  There is telling and this has caused me to leave March with cold and enter April trying to recover.  but that is hard to do when you have to go to work with a office full of sick people spreading their got damn germs!  Stay your ass at home and rest.  

Seemingly that we are a some days into April and how late I am now posting in my blog, how many of you are still alive after April Fool’s Day?  How many of you were brave and crazy enough to play a practical joke on your mother? Uh-hm!  Your mother is the one person you should NEVER play a or any practical jokes on.

Let me explain why!  At any given time your mother can cause you bodily harm with her love. How? With that one special dish that you love when she cooks it.  How about when she washes your clothes or when you ask her for a few extra dollars.  When she cleans your room or if she has never cleaned your room then all of a suddenly she starts, then you should worry.  How about when she is quite for a long time.  You know us mothers are never quite, and that is when you should really worry.  So NEVER play a joke on your mother. 

The first and last I did a joke with my mother, she threaten me with God and scared the bee-jesuses out of me!  A thousand thoughts enter my mind as to how other mothers can cause their children to be on their best behavior.  With love, of course!

April seems to bring those last minute tax procrastinators! Those are my favor people.  Why? Because in their own way they are telling the government “you now have to wait on me!”  Me. I am one of those people who file their taxes as soon as I get all my W2s. "So give me my money punk!"   Though Busta Rhymes song "Baby I got your money!" comes to mind during the tax season.  This sista here needs to pay her credit cards off first so I can do more damage with them.  CHARGE baby, CHARGE!

April does bring us some unknown holidays like:

April 10^th: National Sibling Day!  I am not claiming those fuckers! I am the only one with common sense!

April 12^th: National Grilled Cheese Day.  I have to wait until after work to make one.  To make it before going to work would not have a fresh grill cheese smell loaming in the air at the right time of the day.

April 13^th: National Peach Cobbler Day.  Hey, hey, hey! This will go good with a cup of Irish coffee! Don't be cheap on the whisky! 

April 15^th: National Day of Silence.  Y’all I am the wrong person for this day and I can recognize that!

April 17^th: National Bat Appreciation Day.  I can go a few avenues with this one, for instance, bat the animal however that makes me think of using my baseball bat to beat NBC and Amazon’s ass if they do not bring us, Dracula’s Army, a second season of Dracula with JRM! I thought about Batman but I don’t know which actor to go with.  Though Adam West will always be my main man however the verdict is still out on Val Kilmer, Christian Bale, George Clooney, and Michael Keaton.  Ben Affleck's ass don’t count!

April 23^rd: National Talk Like Shakespeare Day. Hell most of us still don’t know how to talk English!  And we talk English. 

April 30^th: National Hairstylist Appreciation Day . . . for everyone else visit the hood that way you see some unique and outrageous hairstylists.  Go my Sistas!

So I live in Milwaukee, as I have mention before and Wisconsin is a state that has no ideal what weather temper its wants to display per day and stay with it for a few days.  For those you who live in sunshine states and currently have warm weather, I am jealous.

So if I start now and continue throw out the month of April for better weather in May.  Who in the hell am I kidding? We all know that mother nature is simply a bitch!