I should have known better when I first saw my Auntie Doreen with a Google page. My Auntie Doreen, who we call Auntie Do is about as old school as you can get! As far as she is concern technology is an enemy for the enemy. So we have to give her the benefit of the doubt when it comes to social media because she still is illeteral to both social media and technology. (Sidebar: I just ask for an ass kickin from her! WOW!) Now when she started posting simple things I was like "Good Auntie you are catching up with us in the social media world!" I was so proud of her trying to keep with not just her kids and grandchildren but also her nieces and nephews and grand nieces and nephews. And then she had told me that she wanted to try to keep up with me. (Giggles . . .hahahaha!) Right, too funny y'all!
So does a good niece like me do? I teach her the simple things with certain apps that she can use and have fun with. That way she can show a little something something to her son Larry and to her nephew (my cousin) Quenton. I can not show and explain every thing that I know because it will be way over her head to the point I will get a beat down from her for her not understanding. Now this would include her finding different apps for variety of ring tones. (She heard my Japanese ring tone and she was like "I want that on my phone!"), so I did. I had to teach and tell her to stay out of her settings because she kept changing things and then want to know why her phone was not working. AUNTIE!!! For real?
Ok, now that was a while back in this year and recently my Auntie Do decide to IM in Facebook. Now I hope y'all are sitting down when I explain this. Most of my family members know that when you IM me on FB, I get trigger finger happy. And when they send a post they let time goes by before sending another message. Because once engage in a conversation on IM then for every one sentence they are typing, I have already given them eight sentences which often leads to them telling me to slow down my typing so that they can get a word in. Yes, ladies and gentlemen I am laughing my ass off because I can image their faces as I am typing the words in the screen and pressing send. The only person who did not know about my happy finger was my Auntie Do and boy did I let her have it. I started off slow with her in the speed and slowly I increase my speed of typing. Then I started to go so fast in the my typing that Auntie Do managed to typed "Slow down B*tch! You are typing too damn fast for me to read." I was on the floor dying from laughing. But then Auntie Do let me have it too. . . . I got every bad word in the dictionary follow by "I ought come up there and kick your genius ass!" For me it was a great torture practical joke well done on my Auntie Do to make up for April's Day! It was hilarious!
So then later by a few weeks, I had finished another piece in my blog and a couple days later I was checking on the status of my blog when I came upon something that struck me like hhmm. My Auntie Do, y'all she was at it and she cut loose on Google+.
The message read like this:
So does a good niece like me do? I teach her the simple things with certain apps that she can use and have fun with. That way she can show a little something something to her son Larry and to her nephew (my cousin) Quenton. I can not show and explain every thing that I know because it will be way over her head to the point I will get a beat down from her for her not understanding. Now this would include her finding different apps for variety of ring tones. (She heard my Japanese ring tone and she was like "I want that on my phone!"), so I did. I had to teach and tell her to stay out of her settings because she kept changing things and then want to know why her phone was not working. AUNTIE!!! For real?
Ok, now that was a while back in this year and recently my Auntie Do decide to IM in Facebook. Now I hope y'all are sitting down when I explain this. Most of my family members know that when you IM me on FB, I get trigger finger happy. And when they send a post they let time goes by before sending another message. Because once engage in a conversation on IM then for every one sentence they are typing, I have already given them eight sentences which often leads to them telling me to slow down my typing so that they can get a word in. Yes, ladies and gentlemen I am laughing my ass off because I can image their faces as I am typing the words in the screen and pressing send. The only person who did not know about my happy finger was my Auntie Do and boy did I let her have it. I started off slow with her in the speed and slowly I increase my speed of typing. Then I started to go so fast in the my typing that Auntie Do managed to typed "Slow down B*tch! You are typing too damn fast for me to read." I was on the floor dying from laughing. But then Auntie Do let me have it too. . . . I got every bad word in the dictionary follow by "I ought come up there and kick your genius ass!" For me it was a great torture practical joke well done on my Auntie Do to make up for April's Day! It was hilarious!
So then later by a few weeks, I had finished another piece in my blog and a couple days later I was checking on the status of my blog when I came upon something that struck me like hhmm. My Auntie Do, y'all she was at it and she cut loose on Google+.
The message read like this:
- Dam Victoria stop we cannot keep up with you stop baby please
- Larry wife can Quenton can but auntie can't I am old o by the way I am moving to Huston and packing up Wednesday looking for a apt in Huston Thursday love you (Now this is a great topic for Is That English!)
So in my mind I was like "What did I do wrong now?" and I did something I knew that I should have not done - I called Auntie Do. (Here is another ass wooppin' that I done introduce myself to.) Auntie Do answers the phone and she said "Hello sweetie!" and there was something about how she said "Hello sweetie!" that made me nervous at the same time felt funny. I told her that I read her message on Google+ and that I got some understanding of what she said, and as I was trying to finish my sentence Auntie Do just goes in and rips me a new one, y'all. (I could not breathe! I was laughing that hard.) She begin to tell me about a conversation that she had with her brother (my uncle) Rodney. She and Rodney were trying to figure out how the click the link on their cell phones to read my blog. (I am trying to get my head around the fact that these two need and took an hour and half to conversed on how the click the link on the cell phone to read various webpages!) Both my Auntie and my Uncle were trying to, not only, console each other on the complex of how to use the new technology of the smart phone but also teach each other on how to use social media on their smart phone. How many of you have family members like my aunt and uncle? (That is funny shit, isn't it?)
Y'all, I am not going to call my Uncle because that is another ass woopin' I would be introducing myself to and I need to keep the current ass that I have. I don't know why my aunt figured that my uncle would be able to help her out with something like that: he is as dead as a door knob when it comes to technology. But between the two of them they still until this day, cannot figure out how to click the link to open the page.
Simple instructions people: to open a link, just move the mouse over the attached link until it turns blue and then click it. It will automatically open on another webpage. Now if you are opening the link on a smart phone like my aunt and uncle, then the link itself is already blue and all you have to do touch it one or two times. This will be followed by a request as to where you want to open the link on: either Browser or Chrome. (Most of us have ready enter our password to use Chrome and have set it up to always be in use, right?) Now explaining this to my aunt was like taking a beauty pageant queen camping. NO! it can not happen nor can it be comprehend.
For my Auntie Do, today's technology features are too advance for her even though the act of it is simple to do. For us tech savvy people most of us can not comprehend as to why they, referring to some elderly and to those who are technology challenge, do not get these simple features. Yes, we can zip through them with the greatest of easy and that is why we love technology - because it makes our lives easier. Am I not right? Raise your hand if your are a gadget person? If you have 5 or more of today's technology gadgets then raise your hand? Hhhmmm . . . yeap!
My Auntie Do got ONE thing! A smart phone and she still can not figure it out!
But y'all, for my Auntie Do, I am the one who is getting her ass kicked because according to her, auntie Do, I am the smart one of the family. But does she not know that I have blonde moments too? Yeah I know how to configured switches and routers; and I know how to use Visio to create a network connection in an office of building; and I know how to do the math to create 1024 IP addresses from 255.255.252.0/22 in Class B IP address. Aw hell people! I will just take the ass kicking from Auntie Do as I explain the simple stuff of technology.
I need life insurance for my ass. Is that possible?
Y'all, I am not going to call my Uncle because that is another ass woopin' I would be introducing myself to and I need to keep the current ass that I have. I don't know why my aunt figured that my uncle would be able to help her out with something like that: he is as dead as a door knob when it comes to technology. But between the two of them they still until this day, cannot figure out how to click the link to open the page.
Simple instructions people: to open a link, just move the mouse over the attached link until it turns blue and then click it. It will automatically open on another webpage. Now if you are opening the link on a smart phone like my aunt and uncle, then the link itself is already blue and all you have to do touch it one or two times. This will be followed by a request as to where you want to open the link on: either Browser or Chrome. (Most of us have ready enter our password to use Chrome and have set it up to always be in use, right?) Now explaining this to my aunt was like taking a beauty pageant queen camping. NO! it can not happen nor can it be comprehend.
For my Auntie Do, today's technology features are too advance for her even though the act of it is simple to do. For us tech savvy people most of us can not comprehend as to why they, referring to some elderly and to those who are technology challenge, do not get these simple features. Yes, we can zip through them with the greatest of easy and that is why we love technology - because it makes our lives easier. Am I not right? Raise your hand if your are a gadget person? If you have 5 or more of today's technology gadgets then raise your hand? Hhhmmm . . . yeap!
My Auntie Do got ONE thing! A smart phone and she still can not figure it out!
But y'all, for my Auntie Do, I am the one who is getting her ass kicked because according to her, auntie Do, I am the smart one of the family. But does she not know that I have blonde moments too? Yeah I know how to configured switches and routers; and I know how to use Visio to create a network connection in an office of building; and I know how to do the math to create 1024 IP addresses from 255.255.252.0/22 in Class B IP address. Aw hell people! I will just take the ass kicking from Auntie Do as I explain the simple stuff of technology.
I need life insurance for my ass. Is that possible?
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