Question 5 - Who Wrote What?

In this world of technology and as many homes become or start to become a computer savvy with the gadgets, I am wondering how that is working out for some of you. (Haha haha)  If you have not master that smartphone then there is no way that you can conquer that new smart refrigerator or stove. GE might bring good things to light but simple instructions is not one of them. (Haha haha)

My mother wants the new iPhone.  She just master how to use a FireStick, there is no way in hell that she will be able to use a new iPhone to it fullest potential! She only does three things on her current phone: talk, text, and disable apps that she does not understand how they work for her.  But she the new phone to put Uber and UberEats on it. That is all she care about besides being able to receive pictures on her phone. I don’t know how she manage to mess up the setting to receive pictures. But we will see how it goes when she receive her new Android phone. (Haha haha!)

Okay I got a question for everyone and it is a question that has thrown some of us geeks off track slightly.  How would you react, knowing all that you know about computers, if you learned that a sad and beautiful poem that touched you deeply had been written by a computer?

Think about this question first before you answer that.  Most people would be like “what the hell else can the computer things do?”  Some of you would be like “I would not put it pass it because computer are taking over everything in our daily lives.”  Some of you might be like “if that is the case then I can use the computer to write my love letters or apologize letters to my girlfriend/wife.” (Haha haha, that is funny! Your ass is still in the dog’s house.)

What is wrong with buying a card from Hallmark? They still make cards for all occasions including the “I am thinking of you!” card which some of you should use before getting in trouble.  Better yet, what is wrong with you just simply saying “Honey I was wrong and I am sorry.” Don’t you dare ask if you can be forgiven! Really!?!?

Better yet, why can’t you write your own love letter with your true feelings? A woman (or girl) would appreciate knowing how you truly feel if and when you write your own letter. Some of you might get a real good outcome from it and some probably would not, however it would be better than you having the computer writing your love letter. The outcome from would be greatly different.

But let us not be surprise as to what computers can do these days.

Where would you live? Question 4

While reading the Book of Questions I came across this question that had me thinking for a few days. Come to think of it, quite a few questions in the Book of Questions has cause me to really think about them.  But this question I really have to answer in many points of views.

Ignoring all financial considerations, would you rather spend the next 5 years confined to an urban mecca like New York City, or a beautiful, isolated town on the California coast?

First let me speak on my own personal view on this question: neither.  They are both expensive to live at because where do I want to spend my money at or on . . .FOOD!  Eating at various restaurants is what I love to do and I would have a fit if one, I could not find a good restaurant living in an isolated town in California and two, having to wait months to get into a good restaurant while living in a city like New York City.  Yes, for me food would be the key.

But let me say what a lot of us would be thinking about both California and New York City.  A few or many are waiting for that one earthquake that would cause California to fall into the Pacific Ocean. It is not funny but it is the joke! The coast line along California is very beautiful but that damn joke in annoying to have in the back on one’s mind. With New York City one of two things can happen. One being that one year a really bad snow storm comes along and hide the city for a year or two. Or two, if the icebergs in both North and South Poles should melt away completely causing a huge water surge that could completely take the city underwater.  Another thought to have in the back of one’s mind. (Haha haha!)

(Just think about it!)

If I did not have to consider having those adequate finances then I would be doing some research on which state would be the best to live in would be advised. Of course, that almighty JOB would be very sequential to one survival regardless of where you live.

If I was rich, I don’t think that I would want to live in neither location, however I would find a city that I find comfortable to live in.  Though most people would want to live in a big city like New York or Miami or Chicago. If we go out the United Stated, I think most women would prefer Paris or London. I am going for London myself if I was rich. But now that I think about I think I would have a house in somewhere in the states and one in London, and just travel to everywhere staying a week here and a week there.

Though I am sure that many of you do have somewhere in mind as to where you would live at if you were rich or even if you could ignore all financial considerations, you have an ideal as to where you want to be living at.

Take a moment to think about that question that I asking in this piece. What would you do if put in that position?  I’m curious.

Until next time . . . .

Obsessions!!

So I was talking to some friends about things that we are obsessed with. Everyone one of us have something that we obsessed about, take a moment to think about what your true obsessions.  Mines is watching tv shows from Korea. Occasionally I might catch a good one from China or Japan. Many of us have obsessions that is beyond the normal land what I mean by normal is afford; like collecting art, stamps, tattoos, diamonds to name a few. However let me narrow it down to a few obsessive things to be obsess about. If you had to be obsessed with one  of these things like money, sex, sports, religion or food, what would it be?

In my mind here is what I am thinking: Money kills!! You have people who are so obsessed with money that they are willing to killing a family member or their best friend. A stranger killing another man for his millions is very common. We see it all the time in the television shows. That is why if I ever win the lottery I am not telling my family or friends. Why? Because some of us know that the more money you have, the more problems you get. You got family members who think that they are entitled to get a piece of your good fortune. So they find a way to take that money away from you even through the courts. Though money is necessity to pay those damn bills, pay that car note or fix it, and to purchase our favorite foods with because we got to eat.  While most people spend more money on gas, I spend mines on Uber or Uber Eats. Overall most of us think that money is the root of all problems, and yes it is! That is why most of us have 401Ks.

When I was younger I was obsessed with sex. Now, I am at the age where I am ready to cut his off if he gets too happy it. If I become pregnant at my age, I am cutting his off. If he touch that Hennessey, I am cutting it off. And I love the person who invented batteries.

Now I have traveled around the world and have meet some serious sports funatics. Over in Europa a lot of killings be going on over some serious football (soccer) games. Here in the states, we just get injury with a flying baseball or a leaping quarterback. If you lucky you might get run over by a basketball player.  It amazes me that real sports fans will travel for the favorite team. The amount of money they spend on items for their favorite team like jerseys, hats, scarfs and jogging outfits, etc. The amount of money they spend tickets to the games as well as tickets for the flight to go to the game in a different cities or countries. They even know all the statics involving previous games.  I have a hard time understanding the statistics surrounding my neighborhood.

With all due respect to everyone’s religion regardless of your ethnicity, this is one subject matter I will not touch. There are people who are far more serious about their religion than they are about their football. Nope not touching it. I wish everyone regardless of what religion they belong to, good luck and peace.

As for food, this is a love affair that everyone has including the babies. It is a subject that I would like to spend my life with being in love.  You know when you have a full understanding of how much you love food when you start sounding like Fred Flintstone, “Where is my dinner, Wilma?” With today’s food some of us are obsessed with various ethnic foods, certain dishes, variety of popcorn especially from Garrett’s, certain restaurants.  From that burger to the fried fish, to the barbecue, to which Mexican restaurant has the best tacos. C’mon now you know what particular food you have a fetish for. Mines is Pho with filet mignon, Turkish pizza, chips and salsa, oh my list just goes on and on. The problem is finding a man with the same stomach as me. (Many have tried and have failed!!)

When it comes to food, I am not single minded about that and is open to trying food items. I appreciate the chefs that create new food items for us to try.  I appreciate the various ethnicity in which food can be found in with its various spices to create all new taste buds for us.

So I think that I have made it clear as to what I would have a very strong obsession in/with, that being food. So I am going to pass the question to you: of the five choices that I named at the beginning of this piece, which one would you have an obsession with? Or do you have one that is not on the list? Either way what is your obsession?

Question 2: Child's Toys!

For those of you who have small children, because my child is old and with his own child now; what would you do if your child’s favorite toy, a talking doll on top of that, start trying to convince your child that she/he needed a new friend, and that new friend is the next doll in the company’s line of dolls?

I don’t have any small children but I do have a mother who keeps asking me to buy her a doll. Please understand that I am not referring to Barbie. I had to explain to her that the import fees would way beyond her disability check.

So we parents know that our kids have that one doll or toys that if it goes missing then all hell breaks loose, and we parents scramble to find that child’s toy. Some of us have lose sleep because o that damn toy. Some of us have either burned it or thrown it away for the sake of our own insanity.

We know as parents that our child(ren) will go through that imaginary friend phrase. Some children grow out of it and some children grow into adult and still have that imaginary friend plus am imaginary girlfriend or boyfriend. Along with other imaginary things that some of us can come up with 5 pages about. That is when that doll that my mother wants comes into play for your child.

Now when purchasing a doll for your child (and I am considering a doll for the boys because sometimes they go through a phrase so let’s not excluded them) that it is first from a well-known name like Mattel, Hasbro, Hot Wheels, and Playmates Toy, to name a few. Make sure that it is a real doll and nothing like Chucky and his bride Tiffany. (Sidebar here: did you know that you can purchase those damn dolls off of eBay and Amazon? First let me say that the makers of the dolls may need some psychiatric help and those of you who have purchase these dolls already need to some counseling.)

What I am saying here is double check the damn doll before purchasing!

Here is where a parent should really start being concern. If your child tells some information that you know that child is too young to know. First have that crazy ass look on your face follow by asking that child to give you more details about the topic in which the child is explaining. Once that child has finish explaining, go get yourself a drink as you come to a comprehensive understanding as to what was explained to you. Understand this parents, your child does not need help, I recommend that you get rid of the doll first, if there is one. If not, then understand that your child may have done some research on that topic with the help of today's technology. You should still have that drink.

In my mind, I would be going like,”What kind of voodoo shit is going on here?”, “Who can I call to perform an exoticism on a toy?” followed by several more glasses of serious hard stuff. (Well hell, I need something to help me collect my thoughts!) However if my mother can get her blowup doll to talk, then I will leave all liquor alone.

The Puppet Master for those you who are familiar with the movie, I am glad that it came and went, and is currently buried somewhere. I have my mother to thank for freightening me with one things in life. Only person in this world that I trust with his talking dolls is Jeff Dunham the Ventriloquist. From Achmed to Bubba, Jose, Melvin, Sweet Daddy, Peanut and Walter, I am so glad that they all live with him. I can trust those dumdies for real. Not like Chucky . . . .Hell nah y’all!!! Chucky can come visit you at any damn given time!!

Until next folks!

Food for Thought: Question 1

So as technology becomes more and more a part of our lives.  And those of us who truly know how to use technology to make our lives so simple, I have a very good question to ask.

Would you rather lose the use of all motorized vehicles, all telecommunication devices and computers, or one of your hands?

Motorized vehicles are becoming computer enhanced to start by themselves, warm your ass, and finally include that all important map for men to find their way around, since they don’t like to ask for directions. I often hear some people complaint about how they don’t like cars becoming more like computers with a hard drive in them.  Because some of you may have experience where your car stopped in the middle of the street and caused an accident.  And what is the first excuse that you should use?  It is the manufacture fault!! But why can’t it be the driver’s fault since he or she probably did not completely read the car manual to know how to work the car and use the car to its fullest.  Dealers only gives you clip notes about the car to sale it. I love it when a non-tech savvy person purchase a new technology car and then get mad at the technology.  So not the car’s fault people!!

With a show of hand, how many of you can go a day without using your smart phone?  Millions of y’all cannot go 5 minutes.   Some of y’all are even like me and sleep with your cell phone and\or tablet or laptop in the bed with you, right?  Yeah, I am woman enough to admit that and would often prefer them than a man in the bed with me.   Oops! 

I remember the telephone being a much bigger device that sat on the table somewhere in the corner of the living room or on the wall in the kitchen.  Standing there with the receiver in one hand and your other hand on your hip with an expression on your face as you ask the question “Why wasn’t Bobby Jo smart enough to figure that out?” Or “Where in the hell is Marsha?”

If you really think about it, the game Operation was your computer back then, and today we have the Kindle.  Okay that is my new game board that I can carry in my purse.  All 35 games for now, to entertainment me even when I am on a boring date. 

Because of telecommunication devices and computers, some of y’all do not know how to leave work at work!  Some of you husbands need to explain to your wife that your job is your mistress.  And you are really having a hard time breaking up with the laptop because she does not know how to accept “no” for an answer.  Advice: stop giving her input.

But to lose a left or right hand, then how will I wash the dishes?  I would need to find a new way to put my cousins in a head lock.  You know some people use both hands to get off, I cannot image how will work out.

So to answer the question that I asked, I would pick motorized vehicles because I need my hands to order Uber on my telecommunication device.

Until next time.

Time has flown!!

Hello old friends,

Long time, long hear from me.  I have yet to express Happy New Year to many of you and I am sure that some of you are like me in saying "I am so glad that 2017 is over with, however, when did 2018 get here?" Better yet, when is Trump getting his ass out of the White House? I can hear Auntie Do saying "You Late!" (Sidebar: we will be talking about that expression later.)

How have you been? I hope that everyone has been doing well and keeping their spirits high despite all the things that may or may be happening in one's life.  I know that it has been a while and since the end of July, I believe. Things have been extremely busy for me both personal and professional.

• My best friend Glenna passed away at the end of July.  I was more shock about the family secret then I was about her death.
• I got a new job on the day of Glenna's death. There was drama with that job and I had to give it to the Lord.
• I had to be extremely honest with my next door neighbor and his lack of skills.
• My mother moved in with me and I cannot even begin the describe the immense amount of emotions that came from me towards.
• My so-called Uncle Keith was supposed to relocate to Texas as well with my mother. However, some new development of things had emerged and I am just left dumbfounded.
• Had to move from where I have been living for a year to where my Aunt Do and Uncle Jeff was living in Garland. This is going to take a series of posting to even describe the begin of living with them.
• Left one job to go to a better paying job.  The new job is the blessing from the previous job.
• My new traveling route is quite interesting with the express buses and the TRE.

I know that we are only 3 months into 2018 but I am really having a hard time getting into this year because of Trump and his flip floppin' ass.

Well, I have some much to share with you guys on my blog that I can not wait. But first I need Aunt Do to explain to me why I am late and what is it that I am supposed to be late for.  That seems to be her favorite phrase besides "you'll figure it out." What is there to figure out if I am the research queen.

Later

The Tudors: The First 2 Seasons

Y’all I am about to be so real in this piece because I watched Seasons 1 and 2 of The Tudors!  If I had no angry issues before watching the two seasons this show gave me additional issues that I did not need. Caused me to roll my neck, cut my eyes at the characters and finished 4 bottles of wine. Plus, I had to hide the baseball bat that I was saving for #NetflixSaveDracula movement. Because I was ready to go to town on this show!

Let me first give an applause for the well-done performances in causing me to want to town on y’all ass. Well-done and outstanding job to the writers!  After watching the first 2 seasons I did not think that I could have watched this showed while it was being aired on ShowTime while I was pursuing my bachelor.  I would have failed some of my classes trying to figure out what the hell happen? The first 2 season left me with a few questions and a whole lot of drama that would make me kill King Henry VIII (played by my friend Johnathan Rhys Meyers).

For example, what happen to first baby boy that was produced, yes, I said produced, by your heirness what is his name’s wife in the first season? (Do not correct me on this because I seriously did not catch his name when the King Henry and the mistress said it in bed.) It was made clear to what happen to the baby boy that Queen Katherine carried but what happen with this one?

What happen to the long-haired musician genius from the church and his wife? We know that his wife went somewhat crazy after her sister died. I was surprised to see this dude Mark Sweeten pop into the picture. Who knew Anne’s brother went that way!! (The shade of it all!)

How in the hell did King Henry’s sister, Princess Margaret Tudor (played by Gabrielle Anwar) got sick? Wait, Charles why were you fucking around with the sister anyway? He must have had tiny balls at that time but grew bigger balls when he went up against Sir Thomas Boleyn punk ass! Real talk: Charles (Henry Cavill’s character) needed his ass kick for fucking around on his wife while she was sick! He should have taken up golfing! And his second young wife should have taught him how to play stick really fast when he cheated on her with the niece of France!! Niece of France my ass; I would have jousted his ass across England!

Cardinal Thomas Wolsey (played by Sam Neil) gave me justification as to why I don’t attended church today. (Crocked motherfuckers!!)  Though you have got to give it to Wolsey, he was smart enough in how he got things done for the King. For a Cardinal, it was fuck everybody else it is about the King. Including the Pope. WOW! His ending was sad but not too much.

Thomas Howard, 3^rd Duke of Norfolk (played by Henry Czerny) – they did that during that time. Keep count of how many Dukes occupied a villa\castle like Norfolk?  Really? Where in the hell did his ass disappeared to in the first season?  I mean he was smart enough to leave before that shit hit the fan, so hey.

I can really appreciate a man like Sir Thomas More (played by Jeremy Northam) because he stood his ground about the sanctuary of marriage.  I don’t think would want that on my conscience either but then again, I did cheat on husband, so oh well. I was happy to see that King Henry regretted that whole outcome that took place between him and Sir More.  I was waiting for Sir More’s ghost to pick that cross that he gave to the King as a Christmas present, and beat his ass with.

With Sir Thomas Boleyn (played by Nick Dunning), y’all let his punk ass off easy!! Look, look here! He did more dirt than his daughter and then played the high and mighty dummy for real. If my father told me to let my husband have his mistresses, I would have filed for diplomatic immunity with France. ASAP!! Because the action that would have followed ladies and gentlemen. . . (singing the song: Murder she wrote! La la la. Murder she wrote!)

Let’s talk about Anne’s ass (played by Natalie Dormer) for a minute!! Y’all, I did so much cussing in Season 2, I was ready to throw my laptop across the room! I have not done this much cussing since I read Shakespeare’ King Richard III. The original crocked motherfucker right there! How in the hell can you kill your older brother and turn around fuck his widow at your brother’s funeral? Really? In Shakespeare’s world, are we sure that Anne was not a niece of Richard III? Because I think that is how she got her fucking skills, she did not learn them from Daddy Boleyn and Uncle Howard!! I cannot see how that was possible?! Take for example innocent Elizabeth. Mommy and daddy have dark hair.  Daddy’s skin is darker and Elizabeth’s skin is much fairer than her mother’s. And I am giving the side-eye to Jamie Thomas King’s character.  I am just saying that Anne had some skilled and you draw your own conclusion on that one.

Queen Katherine of Aragon (Maria Doyle Kennedy), I was really rooting for she because she been had on castle block longer and she was entitled to everything.  I love the fact that the Queen stood her ground about who she was and what she wasn’t going to be.  I did cry when she passed away! And I was ready to whoop the King’s ass for not letting Mary see her mother in 4 years. No let me take that back, I need to see sir Thomas Boleyn punk ass for telling Mary that she was forbidden to see her mother and I was wondering did the King really allowed this? That probably goes to that some intelligence that I am about to mention.  

But see, if I was Queen Katherine, I would had taken Anne to the side when she showed her ass the first time, let Anne’s ass know that my army verse your NO army little girl.  Put Anne in her place from the beginning. King Henry was smart to keep Queen Katerina in England because he knew if Queen Kat went back to Spain his ass would have been grass. I was amazed that despite all the pussy he was getting, he still had some intelligence to understand that fact. (Some intelligence.)  But at the same time, again if I was Queen Katherine, I would had gone the fuck upside King Henry’s head with one of the many heavy crosses that they had sitting around in the castle.  And how in the hell did King Henry get sprung by Anne when his revolving door for forever in session? (In my opinion, that is the only thing that Anne did right! She tamed his ass!)

And if I was Queen Katherine, I would have had me some sistas in my corner, I don’t mean her sisters from mom and dad (please pay attention to the spelling!) We would have hot rodded a few carts and ran over the King’s count. We would have slacked around and body slammed a few of the King’s guards and if King Henry did not know what S & M was, we would have educated his ass real fast!

So here is where we are standing at the end of Season 2 of The Tudors: Anne got her well deserve karma and there is a saying that applies here for her: how you got him is how you will lose him. Another saying: you will rise quick but you will fall-down faster. Her brother got his karma for the way he treated his wife. Talk about the closet for real and R. Kelly would have told him to stay there! Poor Elizabeth but hooray for Mary because besides her mother, Mary was still respected by the English people, majority the King’s court, all the kings from other countries like France with the marriage offer to Mary and not Elizabeth, and from her own father. (Season 2, I think episode 7 or 8, King Henry is leaving after visiting Elizabeth, he sees Mary on the balcony and he bows to Mary.)

And King Henry VIII!! From watching all the sex from seasons 1 and 2 that I decided to go on a fucking hiatus! (JRM, this is a compliment. . .you know you need your ass whooped for such a kick-ass performance! Did I not express to you that I do not do emotions? We had this conversation before. WTF?? No that is not right. What the banana & cream? Nope that is not right either. Fuck it. We had this conversation!!!)

I do apologize for cussing so much in this piece but look at it this way: I did not have to wait until that time of the month to let my angry out!  Hell! Let’s see what happens in seasons 3 and 4.

Until next time!